The Nobody

So in a recent project for school we had to write a short essay of our personal experiences with prejudice. So I decided to share it with my wonderful followers, here it is

It was my second year of junior high, I was and 8^th grader, the kind of in-between awkwardness you were older than the new teenagers of 7^th grade and younger than the “high school” kids of 9^th grade. That was the year that most of us found a specific social or ethnic group to “hang out with”.  There were the “preppy populars”, The gossipy girls, athletic guys, and “swagtastic kids”, Ranging from ethnic groups of white, African American, and Latino. Then there was the “Indie Populars” which were the musicians, intellectual funny guys, the gamer girls and boys, Artists, Consisting of whites and Asians. There were the typical over achievers, class clowns, ect. And then there was me, the awkward girl who spent her entire 7^th grade in the library. I tried to fit into every group I could find. I was too white to fit in with colored people and too dark to fit in with white people, I wasn’t smart enough to fit in with Asians. I didn’t have enough talent to fit in with the art kids, too awkward to even try to approach a popular kid. I wasn’t a gamer or a comedian. I was just there, and I tried everything to be accepted even if that meant changing who I was. No matter where I tried I would get teased for being “different”. I would go home every day questioning “what’s so bad about me? Why don’t fit in?” Even at home I felt out of place, I was always was compared to my sister she was smart, beautiful, thin; she had a lighter skin tone too. I thought about it for awhile and I came to the conclusion that it was my skin color, in all the magazines I read having fair skin was beautiful, delicate. Even in the fairy tales I grew up reading described princesses with beautiful fair skin. I tried to hide my skin whenever I could, then one day I saw an ad in a magazine it was skin whitening cream “Have gorgeous fair skin in weeks! Soft and pretty like silk” The next day I hurried to the local drugstore and bought myself some. I was so excited I would finally be able to fit in. But after two weeks nothing changed in school but only at home, my grandma would complain always “Your skin is too light!” so my new look wasn’t exactly approved by her. I talked to my mom about it and she just said “Well try talking to people then they will see your personality and love you” Well I tried that and the funny thing I just became more of an outcast. My love for anime and manga, my weird sense of style, I was a fantasy writer, and even with absolutely no musical ability I still loved to sing. I would spend lunches just trying to get the nerve to talk to these people again so just maybe I would be accepted.